Is there any doubt that misogyny is well and alive in Malaysia?
Last Sunday, dozens of men competed for the title of Mr. Malaysia. You know what it is. Men, in their shorts, showing off their six-packs and other muscles in order to prove that they are the best bodybuilders in the country. Do you hear a viral ruckus over it? Of course not, because they are men. Look, I’m not here to tell you what you should or should not do, but to all Malaysians, especially Malay Muslims, can we have some consistency please? Most of the contestants are Malay Muslims, but somehow it is acceptable for them to parade their bodies on stage because it is a sport. Has everyone forgotten the cruel, unnecessary attack on national gymnast, Farah Ann Abdul Hadi for wearing a leotard? She actually won two gold medals at the 2015 SEA Games for our country. Again, I’m not interested to get into a debate of what’s wrong and what’s right. But I am interested to point out a few things about our religion that these conservative Muslims may have missed while proactively imagining themselves as moral policemen.
First of all, hijab and modesty apply to both men and women. It’s not just the role of the women to cover herself up in order not to tempt men, but men are also supposed to be modest in dressing, as in, not showing off their excessiveness. I know the limits of a man’s aurat, but modesty is more than aurat. It is a state of mind and physical form of worship.
For my second point, I would like to point to an oft-cited ayat, but seldom fully understood, much less fully practiced: “Tell the believing men to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is Acquainted with what they do.” (24:30) God actually commands men to lower their gaze. When you see an attractive lady, you are not supposed to stare further, but to lower your gaze! Now, these social media trolls who unabashedly slammed Farah Ann for her leotard showing off the shape of her genitalia, where did your eyes linger? If you truly understand Islam, the moment you saw her picture, turn your eyes away and keep your comments to yourself. You are just giving away your lack of understanding by being anonymous keyboard warriors.
This idea that women should cover up for men does not stop online, obviously. I am still shocked that today, in the 21st century, victim blaming is still high in Malaysia. What is victim blaming? Saying that a woman deserves to be sexually assaulted by the way she dresses. Whatever your views are on the way a woman dresses, there is no justification for rape. OK, let’s dial it down. Whatever your views are on the way a woman dresses, there is no justification to call her names and to insult her. Do you really think that is what our beloved Prophet would do?
Call me a feminist, call me an idiot. But make no mistake, misogyny is a sickness that is not going away in our country.
There is a hadith from Imam Malik’s Muwatta which I find appropriate to end this post: “The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, passed by a man who was chiding his brother about modesty. The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Leave him. Modesty is part of Iman (faith).’ ” Rather than joining in a tirade against this man’s brother, what did our loving Prophet do? He told the man to leave his brother alone. Insulting someone for his or her lack of modesty is not the way of our Prophet. Then what in the world do you mean that you are speaking on behalf of Islam when you insult other people for the way they dress and act?
Back to the Mr. Malaysia competition, again I repeat, I am no Islamic scholar. I am not here to tell someone how they should or should not dress. But please, I beg fellow Malaysians, if you can compromise with males showing off their aurat in the name of sport, show the same respect and understanding to females. If you feel it is necessary to review female attire for sports, please do the same for men. It is time for everyone, male and female, to take the high road and say stop this hypocrisy against women. Equality.